Finding Mauna Loa

*Continued from previous post, Finding Freedom.

The moment I stepped onto Hawai`i soil, I felt a shift move inside me. I felt the Hawai`i spirit seep through. A grand ocean separated me from a place known as home. And, I would spend 4 weeks on a island in the sun. Weight was lifted.

I remember my anxiety overwhelming the flight and now baggage claim. Did my luggage get lost? Calm the breathing. Relax. I grabbed my bottle of essential oils, made by a friend, and rubbed it all over my hands. Breathe. Relax. I ended up at my destination to unpacked and pack again for a 3 day beach camping trip on lava rock at the base of Hualalai. See post, Camp Lava Rock.

It wasn't until my feet hit the pepper sandy beach when I heard Mauna Loa being whispered in my head. Her sweet singing voice carried a faint melody. The words Mauna Loa was all I could make out. It repeated over and over again. I couldn't sleep at night. It haunted my dreams and plagued my mind each day.

I hiked along the coast line on the lava rock. Hiked in and out of craters and miniature lava tubes of this grand massive field of black. The voice still singing in my head. Mauna Loa is calling me to her and I don't know why. All I feel is relieved and a deep connection to the land. I'm very sensitive to my surroundings and feel energies move all around me. This particular spot, I could visibly see the red lava flow and form, as it cools on the surface. I could feel the heat and the strength of Mother Pele. I could feel the power of Mauna Loa.

It was mesmerizing. It was peaceful.

After camping, the voice still sang to me. I had to at least see Mauna Loa, to understand. I couldn't explain it. The reason for the trip? Well, I felt like I kept finding new ones. God told me to come. Now, Mauna Loa is calling me to her or is it the Devil playing tricks on me? My heart tells me it is her, Mauna Loa. My heart tells me to read Mother Pele's story to find the answers I seek.

A random store clerk and I had an interesting conversation a few days after I arrived. I was on the hunt for a gift for my daughter and browsed over to the pants section. She interrupted me to say...

You have strong energy baby girl. Positive energy. And a beauty so radiant, I cant help but smile. Your energy makes me happy. But, I feel your darkness. You seek Mauna Loa baby girl. She will give you strength and courage. She will heal your pain and bring you a new woman. A changed woman. Keep smiling baby girl. Keep the Hawai`i spirit in you. You will return home a whole new woman full of love. I promise you the right man will be waiting. You will be a better mother. Go find Mauna Loa. She will guide you."

Before I left, we talked and she helped me with my Hawaiian pronunciation. She explained more in depth of Mother Pele and what the Hawai`i spirit means to the locals. To search for the spirit, one must be in desperate need. The spirits move on the land and the lava gives great strength. The locals are currently fighting to save sacred land on Mauna Kea. Yet, I somehow feel connected to this land. It reminds me too much of New Mexico, my motherland, my family roots.

As I drove on Saddle Road, I saw Mauna Loa for the first time. She stretched out more grand than I had imagined. Before, from a far distance, you don't fully get the best view. Her presence gave me the chills, as I stared out the window mesmerized. I thought about what the clerk and other locals have said, previously. She has strength. I felt it.

Saddle Road stretched between Mauna Loa and Mauna Kea. Protesters are gathered to stand together peacefully to share Aloha and fight for what is sacred. I want to stand with them. Hear their stories. Hear the tales of ancestors. Hawai`i feels like home and I don't miss anyone or anything about California. Just my babies of course :)

The simple Hawai`i life you cant find it in California. There is a different energy here. Spiritual. This island in the sun is beyond words can describe. I finally feel freedom. No longer a prisoner within myself.

I'm half way though my trip and will touch the grand volcano in a few days.

I am nervous.

XO - R. Mae